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Mole rats

I've posted about these creatures before, but just tonight I discovered the naked mole ratcam via the naked mole rat Tribe.

Suffer the Little Gnomes

The poor, tortured souls.

But a Tub

I've been shopping for bathtubs. I think I'm in love with La Scala™ (details).

Nude



Guess who might like this?

Brooklyn, Reality, TV

A nice piece of writing (mentioned in a Mefi comment).

Pretty Nails

Official Passion Merchandise.

Invented Slang

We've all heard of Cockney rhyming slang and Verlen, but I have recently discovered through a Tribe dot net "Wordfreaks" group a rare American slang called Honkish and gay British slang called Polari.

There's no website for Honkish outside of Tribe (yet), but here's some information from the Tribe:
1. HISTORY
"It all started at a high scool in Essex Junction, Vermont, during the mid 80's. The perpetrators originally wanted some code words so they could talk about boozing and smoking and hooking up with girls without being overheard and busted. But some of the personalities involved were, and are, pretty obsessive and creative, and the code word project rapidly grew into a species of pig latin. This part is not unusual--a lot of high scool kids do things like this. The unusual part is how it has managed to stay alive and just continues to grow.
After high school, a couple of the Honkish guys (including the obsessive nutcase who really drove this project) went to college together at the University of Vermont. That's where I met them. They had a band, which I also did, plus they were active in theater. One of my best friends from high school and college was a big guru in the theater department and they were friends of his.
A lot of people would have let the high school pig latin die when they got to college. But these weren't most guys. They kept it up without missing a beat. They spoke it to people who had no idea what they were saying and then acted like those people were ignorant for not understanding. They were, at times, really annoying about the whole thing. There are people in this world who really don't like them, mostly because of the incessant use of Honkish.
So that was the lever--they just wouldn't speak anything else. And so their friends joined in. It was good fun. At that age, after all, anything that makes you part of an exclusive group is per se fun, plus it was very advantageous to be able to talk about how you'd like to get your cubs with the snig right in FRONT of the snig, without her having any idea what you were saying.
These guys kept it up after graduating from college, and still speak it today. They are now in several different bands, but are all still friends. Their immediate circle has now spread Honkish to the next layer of people out. Plus the original Honkish guys spent a few years living in Chicago (now they're in Brooklyn and LA) and worked a lot in England. So all of those places contain people who can Honk, or (more properly), puz. The fact that a couple of the original guys are now medium famous (and getting more so) has given the whole thing some lift. The fact that I have now volunteer my services as a Honkish instructor to the general public is (a) very weird, (b) funny, and (c) a sign that it is now bigger than all of us.
That's your basic history. I hesitate to name names just yet, but if you stick with the program you'll eventually find out who the guys are.
2. VOCABULARY
OK, here are some basic Honkish terms you will need. For each, I explain the derivation or the origin. Since there is no hard-and-fast system underlying Honkish, I think the best way of empowering you to make up your own is to explain how the currently accepted vocabulary came into being.
Tup Keewah. Hello / What's up? / What's Going On? / Nice to meet you. Tup Keewah is derived from "what peak" or "what's peaking?" Literally--what is it that is coming to fruition right at this moment? As with almost all Honkish words, the meaning is somewhat dependent on context of use.
Shet. or Shet gat. (means the same thing) Goodbye, also, leave. This is derived from "achete gateau" which is french for "buy cake." This is a play on words--"Bye, 'kay" becomes "buy cake" in french. So first that phrase got mis-translated into French, and then shortened. You would say you're ready to go by saying you're "shetty" or "shetty to ret"--that is, ready to shet.
Barg. (adj) Good / cool / I approve / you go, homie. Comes from "good bargain."
Fat. (adj) Bad / gross / evil / sucks. As in, "I can't believe you're being so fat--hoat tub right now." or "that movie was totally fat, I almost fell asleep." Why? Because fat is bad.
Buff. (v) to inflict damage upon, castigate, or injure. Usually used in the first-person passive ("I got buffed"). Example: I went to the DMV to renew my fat tags, but I got totally buffed at the inspection, or, I went up to her and said hey, but she buffed me; are you shetty? I don't really know the full story with this one, but it doesn't come (as many people think) from "rebuffed." It's actually derived from Buffalo, the city. The story was something to the effect that one of the guys had a long-distance love interest from Buffalo who he got in a fight with while she was visiting Vermont and who he sent back to Buffalo following some sort of harsh scene. Or maybe it was him that got sent to Buffalo. Either way, if you've ever been to Buffalo this verb makes perfect sense.
Jed. Sleep / go to bed / crash. Jed is a guy. A guy who used to sleep all the time. Now his name is a Honkish verb. If you're feeling tired, you would say "I'm getting jeddy" (i.e. jeddy to red, that is, ready to jed). If you just had an epic sleep, you might describe yourself as a Jedi. Good Honkish uses double and triple entendres as much as possible.
Tub. Cigarette. Do I really need to explain this one?
Tile. A light. See tub for explanation. Example--hoat tile. Merce.
Merce. Thanks. Shortened from Merci, french for thank you.
SEXUAL TERMS
I got my cubs in. I had sex with her/him. I don't actually know the origin of this one.
Pig. v--to hook up (but not necessarily have sex). The origin isn't anything but crass. It means what it sounds like. Example--did you pig her? Totally pigged her. Did you get your cubs in? Naw, not this time.
Snig. n--hot woman. Adj. Sniggly. This is derived from the verb to pig. "Piggins" are the raw materials for pigging, i.e. hot women. Reversed it becomes Ginsip, and then snig.
Slab. n. balls.
Kid. n. dick.
PARTYING TERMS
Sgurds. n. figure it out.
Deewah. n. weed.
Reeb. n. beer
Peep kacking. imperative verb. Keep packing (as in, that bowl). This one gets used in a lot of other contexts as well. Pretty much anytime you want to tell someone to keep doing anything you'd tell them to peep kackin'.
From peep kacking you also get "peep my/your kacks", meaning "get me/you high." And the simple, hopeful question "peep?"
Gnob tihi. n. bonghit. The g is pronounced. The whole thing is pronounced ga-nob tihi (both i's like the the i from fish).
Lowb. n. Bowl. Pronounced like loud.
OTHER TERMS
Eef. n. coffee. EefoCK! as an early morning order.
Naish. imperative verb. Shut up. Derived from "shut ain"--shut yer ass. But you would also use naish to tell someone to put something away or hide something. Example--Naish that deewah; spocs are at the trop.
Trop. n. door. From the french word for door, "porte."
Spocs. Cops. It's important not to be too doctrinaire with reversals. "Cops" reversed is spoc, but "spoc" means a single cop.
Lain. v. to lock. Comes from "lock ain." As I think I may have mentioned, "ain" is a pretty ubiquitous word in Honkish, with a broad variety of meanings.
Hoat. Hoat has a lot of meanings. As an active verb ("I hoated it") it means to acquire or obtain. As an imperative verb ("hoat tub") the closest translation is "gimme a", but it actually doesn't translate. "Hoat tub" is not at all rude, whereas "gimme a cigarette" is. Probably because in that sense hoat means not only "gimme" but also "do you have." Because I could say to you "hoat tub?" as a question, which could mean either "do you have a smoke for me" or "would you like a smoke" depending on context. As a noun, a hoat is a score, a success, a win. Example--I got front row tickets! What a hoat! Hoat's original derivation is long since obscured by usage. It comes from hoat kanger--coat hanger. Way back at the very beginning it meant "hey, use that coat hanger there to get me that thing off the table without getting up." That's where the "give it here" meaning derived from. Pronounced "hote."
Hubble. double. Comes from hubble doat (double hoat), but is always used in place of "double", usually without the doat. There is another play on words that derives from hubble doat. Hubble doat! as an exclamation means D'oh x 2 (think Homer Simpson). Example: Dude, did you see that snig? Doat! Well guess what? I pigged her! Hubble doat! (I warned you it was all totally crass--it was invented by teenage boys, what do you expect?)
Futz. v. to putter or do nothing in particular. Comes from "stuff." Example: Tup keewah? Eh, futzing. Peep kacking?

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